Welcome to The Horse and Jockey online.

Here you can find all the latest news, and information about our great upcoming events. We are located on the roundabout over the canal bridge on Waddicar Lane - An easy walk along the Leeds-Liverpool canal towpath to a fine pint.

Trisha's Still Curious - 14/05/2008 Trisha is still aski9ng Twizzy about his circumcision. She asked him when it was done and Twizzy told her "when I was 2 days old" "Did it hurt?"she asked "Too fucking right" replied Twizzy "I couldn't walk for a year" She is blonde you know. Doctor Don - 08/05/2008 There's been a great deal of unrest in the community lately. Now, I've put this down to the general unrest due to the rescession. It can't be much fun paying 200+ K for a house and then getting Chunky Monkey moving next door. On the other hand I am aware that the nature of life today there are no "Mentors" or "Community Advisors" Anyway, there are problems coming to me all the time and I do find myself repeating my advice over and over again. So everyone can benefit from my advice I'm going to publish, without naming names, the wisdom I'm passing on. This week's first advice goes to Jimmy Vondy, (Shit I promised not to name names- Ah well it's too late now). Anyway, He wanted to know the best way to increase his heart rate. Simple enough question but one which I had a good think about. Jimbo's getting on a bit and even his 13 year old Westie has more life in her than him. Just telling mhim to trot along the canal wouldn't have worked (public liability and all that !) So I arranged for Lisa Montgomery (Barbie) to tell Jimbo she was pregnant and he was the father (he wouldn't have remembered anyway). Heart rate increased immediately! Job Done. The second bit of advice went to an elderly pub cleaner. Let's call her Rose. Now Rose was getting really concerned about face wrinkles. A common problem with the more mature woman. I had a good look at her and told her, in no uncertain terms, "Take Your Bra Off". Once she agreed to this her tits hit her knees but the wrinkles miraculously disappeared from her face. Again, JOB DONE! Another query came to me from one of the lads in the bar. Again, No Names No Pack Drill!. Let's call him Chunky Monkey from First Choice Builders. Now Chunky wanted to know the best way of dealing with a wife who's going through the menopause. A difficult time for any man and one which is full of potential pitfalls. I had no hesitation in telling him to stay out of her way, without giving the appearance that he is avoiding her. My advice was for him to start building a shed in the back garden. Really go to town on it and make it a SPECIAL shed. At least she'll not be suspicious and he'll have somewhere to live when she fucks him off this time. JOB DONE ! Fishing Club-Pwhelli - 29/03/2008 Right then lads it is getting time to get those deposits in for the BASS trips out of Beaumaris. We're keeping it to 6 places per trip and they will all be first come first served, DON'T MISS OUT ! There will be some extra trips this year out of Pwhelli aboard the HAFOD. Most of these trips will be after the Black Bream or Bass but the first one is a TOPE trip. This is sailing at 9am on Tuesday 20th May and there is ONE place left. Transport and bait is all arranged so if you want to catch one of these (see pic) get on board. There will also be a few shore trips organised by me and Trapper. We don't mind taking a few novices but don't start getting on our nerves or we'll dump you.